Hate =Disappointed??

today argue with mommy again...summore grandma said she very disappointed with me....they said i very very lazy.....always dreaming in the bed....i have many things tat i wan 2 do in future...but now on...impossible 4 me....i hate the feelings!

since when i dun trust myself?
i wan 2 study hard 4 spm...but when i study?
exam i din prepare at all....then so wat?
still think tat whether i can get a gud result in spm?

rubbish...useless...stupid...idiot...tat wat they scold me....
well, i think tat too frm now on....i reali is a rubbish, a useless ppl, a stupid n idiot....i din believe on myself anymore....HAHAHAHA....so wat??!!

i make everyone disappointed...then wat would u all do ?
juz give up la....then stop to put any hope in me anymore....i hate when u all said me very clever...it let me feel tat i juz a doll 2 follow wat u all wan....who say is 4 my future?
U all never ask wat i wan....juz think study is 4 my own gud...then better i dun wan it...i dun wan study, i dun wan become the 1 u all wan me be.....is more useless if i cun follow my dreams...


how much tat u all noe about me?
y i become so sleepy everyday?
y i dunwan study?
y i dunwan go to skul?
dun u all try wan 2 noe about it?
then y dun ask me?
y always said tat i very lazy?


I reali hate everything tat i hav now~~